


A Bird Loves a Fish

by Untherius



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Childbirth, F/M, Gen, Marriage Proposal, Mer-sex, Mermaids, Unplanned Pregnancy, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-09
Updated: 2013-02-10
Packaged: 2017-11-28 18:39:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/677579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Untherius/pseuds/Untherius
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A lab accident deprives Pepper Potts of her legs, plunging her into a radically different way of life.  She unwittingly drags Tony down with her.  Naturally, the other Avengers wring an awful lot of nautical mileage out of the whole thing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Pepper Potts strolled down a hallway on the uppermost floor of Avengers Tower. Perhaps her movement wasn't what most people would recognize as a stroll, and if she were to pause to think about it, she'd probably have to admit she hadn't truly strolled for more years than she'd care to recall. There was, however, still a difference between her casual-business pace and her serious-business pace. It was a casual moment.

She paused at the door guarding one of Tony Stark's many laboratories. The labs were arranged in order of the clearance necessary to gain entrance, beginning at a lower floor and progressing upward in order of increasing security. The door before her was considered the most secure and Tony himself was confident that even SHIELD would be hard-pressed to circumvent it.

Unfortunately, it also meant that some of the most dangerous studies were conducted in there and that emergency personnel would be all but unable to reach anyone should something go wrong. Naturally, Tony insisted it wouldn't. While Pepper appreciated Tony's confidence, she also found it annoying sometimes, especially when it clearly went against pragmatism.

She reached for the panel next to the door and paused. Something pricked at the back of her mind. Most people would be inclined to call it intuition, and she was suddenly aware of a very bad feeling about the whole thing. Oddly, she wasn't even sure what it was that bothered her. Tony hadn't discussed his project with her, so she didn't even know if she should _be_ concerned. Yet she was concerned anyway.

She decided to ignore it and pressed her hand against the print-reading panel. It whirred and lit up in green, the universal signal for clearance. Pepper wondered why it was always green. Why not mauve or aqua or violet, she pondered as she bent to peer into the eye-scanner. It whirred as well and after a moment also lit up green. As the door slowly slid open, she made a mental note to suggest to Jarvis a change in the color scheme. Tony would never go for it, so, as the only person authorized to do so, Pepper would go over his head.

She stepped through the door, her high heels clicking crisply on the floor. No sooner had the door closed behind her, then she heard a loud noise from behind a curtain.

“Hit the dirt!” Pepper recognized Dr. Banner's voice running counterpoint to Tony's familiar curses.

A wave of something Pepper didn't recognize tore through the curtain and hit her, throwing her back against the door. Her head hit the metal and she felt her knees buckle as her legs gave out from under her. She was vaguely aware of sliding down toward the floor as her vision blurred and finally went dark.

* * *

Pepper awoke slowly. She was first aware of a hard, cold floor beneath her and something soft under her head. Her clearing vision revealed the faces of Tony and Bruce looking intently down at her. Then she was aware of pain inside her head and a few seconds later, a sort of burning, tingly sensation all over her body.

“Ow,” she moaned.

“No,” said Tony, “try not to move.”

“Wouldn't dream of it,” she croaked. She swallowed, cleared her throat, and then continued. “What... _was_ that?”

“Well, we're...we're not sure,” said Bruce.

“Not sure?”

“We were working with supercritical heavy water,” said Tony.

“Of course you were,” said Pepper sarcastically.

“How do you feel?” said Tony.

Pepper described, as accurately as she could, the various pains she felt. Both men took most of her symptoms as consistent with the various impacts she'd sustained. The internal sensations, however, left them clearly puzzled and that worried Pepper. Even a preliminary scan yielded nothing conclusive other than some background levels of some residual something-or-other that Pepper didn't understand.

“Maybe we should...uh...get you back to your apartment,” said Bruce.

“Yeah,” said Pepper, “sure.”

Bruce and Tony gently picked Pepper up from the floor. Her legs still felt a little wobbly and she was more than willing to accept their support in lieu of a forced re-acquaintance with the floor. Maybe she'd feel better after some rest, though there was no telling what that blast may have done to her.

“If that winds up paralyzing me or something,” she said, “I'm going to personally make both your lives... _and_ that of the Other Guy...hell. Do you understand me?”

“Whatever you say, sweetie,” said Tony, trying to be disarming.

“Tony?”

“Hmm?”

“Just shut up, get to me to my room, and then figure out what happened.”

They spent the rest of the trip to her quarters in silence.


	2. Chapter 2

Pepper awoke feeling rested, rejuvenated and generally herself. That was good news. She opened her eyes and noted that everything looked fine, which meant her eyesight was normal. She sat up without any obvious discomfort, though she seemed a bit stuff at the waist. Something there was resisting the usual bending. If that blast in the lab had fused something, she was going to give Tony a piece or two of her mind, regardless of whether she could spare it, and _then_ she'd give him several levels of hell, _including_ one reserved for child-molesters and people who talk at the theatre.

She was suddenly aware of the usual physiological necessities that accompanied mornings. She pulled the covers off with the intent to head for the bathroom.

When she tried to move her legs, however, she immediately noticed that they seemed to be stuck together. She looked down and felt her whole body freeze. She blinked, then shook her head, hoping to clear it, and blinked again. After a few more moments, she screamed in horror.

* * *

It was an otherwise normal morning in the dining area of Avengers Tower. Thor held a large pot of coffee in one hand and four PopTarts in the other, alternating between the drinking of the one and the eating of the other as he paced back and forth. Tony and Bruce were poring over their notes on a touch screen between bites of granola. Steve inhaled a large omelet and three potatoes-worth of hash browns with a stack of pancakes and six slices of whole wheat toast waiting. Natasha and Clint sipped orange juice between bites of scrambled eggs. Robots stood by waiting to clear empty plates and bring more food upon request.

“So where's Pepper?” asked Steve between bites.

Bruce and Tony looked at Steve, then at each other, and then back at Steve. “You're right,” said Tony. “It's not like her to miss breakfast.”

“That is true,” said Thor, barely making an effort to swallow his food before speaking. “Lady Potts seldom misses an opportunity to lecture us concerning our table manners.”

“Jarvis?” said Tony.

“Miss Potts is in her quarters,” said Jarvis.

Tony felt a spike of worry. “Life signs?”

“I am detecting...”

Jarvis was interrupted by a shrill scream echoing down the hall. Everyone froze in the middle of whatever they were chewing, sipping, or swallowing.

“Is that...?” said Clint.

“Yep,” said Tony nervously. He dropped his milky spoon onto the table and sprinted from the room, knocking his chair over on his way out. The others followed him.

The screaming continued all the way to Pepper's apartment. Tony knocked on the door.

“Pepper?” he called. The screaming continued. “Pepper!” More screaming. “Jarvis...?”

“Overriding door lock now, sir,” said Jarvis and the door popped gently open.

Tony pushed it open as he and the other Avengers burst into the room. “Pepper, what's...?”

Everyone froze and stared at Pepper, who lay in her bed, staring at her lower half and hyperventilating. She'd stopped screaming, but was still emitting frantic squeaky noises. Tony blinked. Pepper's legs...and he'd been very fond of those legs...were gone. In their place was a fish-tail...a mermaid tail, to be precise. It was about as long as her legs had been and slightly wider, tapering nicely from her hips to the wide, slightly-forked, fin fixed horizontally to the tail's peduncle. The fin was shoulder-width, with sturdy edges that looked like they could be bone and supporting rays distributed between them, giving it the appearance of a salmon's. Large scales, covering the entire tail from the base of the fin, which was itself bare of scales, to a line at her waist just below her belly-button, were an opalescent apricot color with diffuse splashes of darker rose and emerald-green. Tony wasn't sure if the tail was simply encasing her legs--in which case the solution could just be a matter of surgery--or if it was something more complicated.

“Good God,” said Tony. “What the hell happened to you?”

Pepper's gaze rose to met Tony's. “What happened?” she shrieked. “What happened?!” She curled the tail up in a graceful C-shape.

No, thought Tony, legs definitely do _not_ bend like that.

“You tell _me_!”

Tony and Bruce looked at each other and then back at Pepper. “We...uh...” said Bruce, “...we don't know.”

“How can you not know?”

Bruce and Tony looked at each other again and shrugged.

“Well,” said Natasha, “you're a very beautiful...uh...”

“Mermaid?” said Steve.

Pepper closed her mouth, her lips tightening. Within moments, she started to cry, softly at first, then becoming a sort of hiccup.

Tony stepped over, put her arms around her and rocked her back and forth. “It'll be okay,” he said, trying to calm her. “Just hang tight...Bruce and I will figure out what happened to you and we'll figure out a way to get you back to normal.” He looked up at Bruce. “Won't we, Bruce?”

“I don't know, Tony,” said Bruce, “I think I kind of like her that way.”

Pepper looked abruptly up from Tony's shoulder and glared at Bruce.

Bruce waved his hands in a defensive gesture. “Yeah...uh...what Stark said.”

“Ow,” said Pepper.

“What?” said Tony.

“Ow!” Pepper was quickly growing agitated. “Ow! Ow! Ow! My...my tail!”

“Oh,” said Tony, “I didn't realize I was....”

“No,” she interrupted, “it hurts! It's...I think it's drying out!”

Tony swept her out of her bed, nearly dropping her in the process. “You're...uh...slippery,” he said.

“Shut-up,” she snapped through clenched jaws.

Tony carried her into the bathroom, thrust her into the shower, and turned the water on. Setting Pepper onto the floor, he stood and adjusted the shower-head so that it sprayed gently onto Pepper's tail. “How's that?”

Pepper nodded. “Better...for all that I still have a _tail_!”

Tony knelt down and kissed her briefly. Then he paused. Furrowing his brow, he placed a finger under Pepper's chin and gently tilted her head.

“Now what?” she said.

“What's that?” he asked pensively.

“What's what?”

There was a slit under her jaw. It wasn't bloody, just slightly pink and moist around the edge. Tony prodded at it. Pepper flinched. “What are you doing?” she said.

“Just hold still.” He pulled back the soft tissue to reveal something brick-red. Then he gently released it and reached across to Pepper's counter to grab a hand mirror. He held it up to her.

“What's that?” she said, her voice threatening to squeak.

“I...uh...think you have gills.”

“Gills? Gills?!” She started to cry again, then stopped as she picked up her hand, which had been resting on her tail. She rubbed her fingers together, then pulled them apart, a thin strand of mucus stretching between them. “And I'm covered with slime!” she moaned.

Tony tilted his head inquisitively. “Weren't you wearing panties when I put you to bed?”

“Yes,” she said darkly.

“So what happened to them?”

Pepper looked at the base of her new tail. Sure enough, her undergarments were gone. “I don't know. Just...go fix it!”

Tony stood up slowly. “I'll be right back,” he said as he stepped toward the door. He paused, then turned back to Pepper. “Don't go anywhere.”

“Ha, ha,” she said flatly.

Tony stepped back into Pepper's bedroom. “She...uh...has gills, too.”

“Oh my God,” said Clint. The others just blinked.

“Well,” said Steve finally, “after the helicarrier and an alien invasion, I guess this can't be _too_ weird...can it? I mean, things can't possible get any stranger.”

“Ten bucks says you're wrong,” said Clint.

Steve looked at Clint. “Now, why does that sound familiar?”

“Don't we all have something better to do than stand here?” said Tony.

Clint and Natasha turned to leave.

“Lady Potts should not remain in the shower,” said Thor.

“Good point,” said Tony. He turned back toward the bathroom.

Natasha glanced over her shoulder. “Um...you do all realize she's naked, don't you?”

The men cleared their throats, hemmed, and generally twitched and squirmed. A gleam in Natasha's eye told them she was thoroughly amused. Eventually, Clint, Thor, and Steve moved to exit the room.

“Oh, and guys?” said Tony. “One more thing...let's keep this under wraps, shall we?”

There were murmurs of assent before Tony ducked into the bathroom and the others made their way out into the corridor.

* * *

Tony walked up to the door to his pool, Pepper in his arms. Even with her hands twined about his neck for support, she was still heavier than he remembered. It must have been the extra muscle in her tail. The mucous layer covering it made holding her a little tricky. It had taken three tries before he'd found the balance point that would let him carry her without her tail slipping one way or the other.

He pushed the door open, being careful not to hit Pepper's head, and then stepped over to the edge of the pool. He looked into Pepper's eyes and she looked back at him with a blank expression.

“You know,” he said, “I really am sorry about all this.”

“Just put me down, Tony.”

He shrugged slightly, then bent forward to put her into the water. Her tail slipped sideways down his arm in an uncontrolled manner. He tried to stop it, but it kept sliding. Pepper started to panic and Tony tried to drop-throw her, but she didn't let go in time. The two of them toppled with a yelp into the pool, landing with a loud and undignified splash.

Tony came up spluttering. He put his legs down and stood up. The pool was only four feet deep where they'd fallen.

Pepper came up in front of him and pulled the hair out of her eyes. “Oh, I'm so sorry, Tony! Are you alright?”

“Yeah. Never better. Good thing this is waterproof,” he said, tapping the arc reactor clearly visible through his wet T-shirt.

Pepper tried to stand, but toppled over instead, uttering a sound of surprise and frustration in the process. Tony caught her. “What about you?”

“I don't have legs!” she moaned. “I just tried to stand up and I can't!”

Tony took her in his arms, unsure what to say.

“Ow!” said Pepper.

“Sorry. I didn't mean to...”

“No, it's my...tail. It hurts again. Badly! Owwwww!”

“Shit,” muttered Tony. “It's the chlorine. You need to get out...now.” He squatted a little, then grabbed her by the waist just above the transition from skin to scales and heaved her out of the pool. The water poured off of her as she settled on the pool's edge. She leaned back and cleared the rest of her tail from the water before rolling over away from the edge.

Tony heaved himself out as well, then rushed over to the wall, grabbed a hose, and began to wash the highly-chlorinated water off Pepper's tail. “Better?”

Pepper nodded, breathing heavily, tears trickling from her eyes.

“Jarvis?” said Tony. “Dechlorinate the pool.”

“I'm sorry, sir,” said Jarvis, “but we need additional chemicals for that and it'll take...”

“Then drain the water and pump fresh stuff in.”

“Very good, sir,” said Jarvis. A moment later, he added, “I've started, but the entire procedure will take...”

“I don't care, Jarvis. Pepper needs a non-chlorinated pool.”

“I see. And Miss Potts, may I say that your tail looks especially elegant?”

“Oh, shut up,” said Pepper flatly. She exhaled, then said, “I'm sorry, Jarvis I didn't mean it.” She relaxed onto the concrete, looking up at the ceiling while Tony continued to hose her down. “I'm going to wake up any minute now to find that this is all a really bad dream.”

“No,” said Tony, “I really doubt it.”

“And how do I know that's not the dream-Tony talking?”

“Going all Descartes on me, are you?”

“Very funny.”

Tony turned off the water, then lay the hose down next to Pepper. “Look, I have a meeting in a couple of hours and my life-model decoy is on the fritz. If you need anything, here's the water and Jarvis can send some food in for you.”

“As long as I can get sushi delivered.”

“You don't like sushi.”

Pepper face-palmed. “Oh, God, it's worse.”

“Just don't panic...further.”

“Just go. I'll be fine...I think.”

Tony knelt down and kissed her before turning to walk out the door.

* * *

It was getting on into evening by the time Tony Stark returned home. It wasn't that home and non-home really differed much most days. He telecommuted a lot, which was one of the nice things about being the boss. Sometimes, however, going off-site was unavoidable. It had been one of those days.

He loosened his tie as he walked past Steve Rogers, still clad in the same T-shirt and sweat-pants he'd been wearing at breakfast. “So what'd _you_ do all day?”

“Same thing I do every day...work out and eat...not necessarily in that order.”

“Sounds exhausting. You really should try Pilates.”

“I'm fine, thanks.”

“Alright,” said Tony over his shoulder, “but if you change your mind, I can have Jarvis stream it online. Better yet, we can get you an actual instructor. Or maybe Zumba?”

Steve eyed Tony suspiciously. “I'll keep that in mind. Oh, and you might want to be careful around Pepper. She's been quiet all afternoon.” At Tony's raised eyebrow, Steve continued. “I could hear splashing and wailing and other various and sundry...uh...noises...all morning. Then she had Jarvis arrange a delivery at lunchtime and we haven't heard anything since.”

“What sort of delivery?”

“A whole salmon.”

Tony's eyebrow rose even higher. “Whole, you say?”

Steve nodded. “Uncooked, too.”

“Hmm.” Tony frowned pensively, then turned and continued walking. A minute later found him face-to-face with Thor, who was standing sentinel outside the door to the pool.

“Good evening, Tony Stark,” said Thor.

“Uh...hi. What's with the...royal guard thing?”

Thor raised an eyebrow, then moved aside. Just before Tony reached the door, Thor said, “I would take care if I were you. A bird may love a fish, yet in which realm would they reside?”

Tony regarded Thor thoughtfully. “So noted.” He opened the door and stepped inside.

The room was dark, lit only by what little filtered in though the small window in the door to the hallway. Tony tossed his tie and jacket against the wall. “Pepper?”

A disturbance in the water told him where she was. “Hi, Tony.” She sounded a lot less agitated than she had earlier.

“How are you doing?” he said as he stepped toward the pool's edge, his vision adjusting to the dimness.

“I think I'm getting used to this.”

“What was with Thor?”

“Oh, that.” She giggled. “He fancied himself the only one with enough integrity to deal with my...state of undress. And hence the lights.”

“I see.” He felt a hand on his leg.

“And you, sir, are wearing _far_ too much clothing.” There was that certain something in Pepper's voice that Tony made a point never to ignore. He quickly obliged with her suggestion and hopped into the pool.

“How's that?” he said.

He felt her swish over to him, place one hand on his shoulder and the other between his legs. “Perfect,” she whispered. “I've been thinking about this for hours.”

Tony could already feel the blood pulsing in his ears. “Well, then...I suppose we...uh...” Pepper stopped his mouth with a kiss. He could hardly believe it. He was making love to a mermaid. Maybe it was _his_ dream and _he_ would be the one to awaken from it. In any case, far be it from him to refuse.

He closed the distance and reached down to where her salient bits should be.

“Not there,” she said. She gently took his hand and moved it up a couple of inches. “ _That_ one.”

Oh...right, thought Tony. He laid himself out alongside her, propping himself off the bottom with a leg and gripping the side of the pool with a hand.

“Don't worry,” said Pepper. “Just wrap your legs around me and hang on.”

“Oh?”

She kissed him again and grabbed him, letting her weight pull them both under. She'd positioned herself perfectly and he felt himself slide into her. She rolled, moving him to the bottom and he instinctively wrapped his legs around her. Tony was beginning to have a glimpse of what it was like to have one's partner between the legs, rather than the other-way-round to which he was used.

Pepper flipped her tail lightly and the two of them moved slowly across the bottom. Tony could feel Pepper's arms around him, holding him in place. The textured surface of the pool scritched at his back. Pepper's scales poked at his skin from beneath their mucilaginous coating...not painfully, but more like what he'd expect were she wearing some sort of body sock.

He felt her vaginal muscles tighten around him. Oh, God, that felt good! That particular sensation increased as they moved, amplified by her up-and-down, porpoise-like motions. Just when he wondered when they might hit the other side, Pepper rolled again so that they were sideways, flickered her tail again, and rolled back again.

Tony suddenly realized that he'd been holding his breath and that it was starting to take a strain on him. He tried to roll them over so he could get some air, but Pepper overpowered him and kept him down. She seemed to have become stronger, too...must be that extra muscle. He tried to let go with his legs and pull out, but Pepper grabbed him and drew him tighter against her. The extra motion threatened to draw of gasp of pleasure from him. He had to admit, it still felt really good, but he had only moments before the inevitable involuntary spasm he knew his diaphragm would make in an autonomic attempt to draw breath.

That spasm came, drawing water into Tony's lungs. It burned at first, but then somehow...he could breathe! Or...well...he at least wasn't drowning and he had no idea why. He smiled and then decided that could wait. He wrapped his own arms around Pepper and surrendered.

He placed a hand on what had been her butt. Its shape had changed like one might expect from a skeletal-muscular remodel. The curves were still mostly there and he squeezed gently. He could clearly feel her scales through the mucus and her hard muscles beneath the scales and the dermis that held them. He felt newly aroused and pulled her toward him.

She gave easily to his intent and wiggled against him. Each motion produced further internal motion as they swam round and round, corkscrewing around the pool. The sensations built upon one another as Tony and Pepper strained against each other's bodies. Water flowed around them, the fluid medium creating a near-anti-gravity environment and as much full-body lubrication as Tony could handle. The slippery mucous covering Pepper's tail made it challenging for him to hang on. He'd always loved a good challenge and he'd already decided that making love to his mermaid girlfriend was absolutely the best challenge ever.

Tony lost track of time as the swimming and swishing and pulsing and grinding continued. Finally, when he could stand it no longer, he felt her stiffen. At that moment, he released into her. It was the most amazing sex he'd ever had in his life! He suddenly realized they hadn't used protection, but he didn't care.


	3. Chapter 3

Tony Stark awoke to darkness. He'd had the strangest dream. He'd dreamed that Pepper had turned into a mermaid and.... His thoughts came to a jarring halt as he realized he was surrounded not by air, but by water! His eyes popped open as his pulse shot through the roof. He was _very_ glad not to have Bruce's condition.

He pushed off the bottom of the pool and thrashed around for a moment before finding the ledge. He lifted himself up onto his elbows and took several good, long breaths, spewing water out of his mouth. Then he noticed he wasn't exactly coughing...which was strange. He was suddenly aware of water running down his neck...more water than there should have been had it just been running off his face.

He tentatively moved one hand and felt beneath his jaw. He froze. There was a pair of slits, one on each side, just like the one's on Pepper's neck. He prodded at them and jerked a little as his fingers touched something inside in a particularly unpleasant and unnerving way. He cursed under his breath.

Propping himself up on one arm, he plunged the other one into the water. He slowly moved it toward his lower half and paused about an inch out from his own hip. He moved what should be one leg sideways, but felt his whole lower body move with it, and then an unnatural pressure against the bottom of the pool that was totally inconsistent with having feet. He cursed again. There was nothing for it. He placed his hand on his hip...and felt slime and scales. He froze. Then, “ _SHIT!_ ”

“Is there something wrong, sir?” said Jarvis from out of the darkness.

“You could say that,” replied Tony. Then he heard a disturbance in the water near him and turned toward it.

“Good morning, Tony,” came Pepper's pleasant-sounding voice.

“Um...morning,” he replied. “Not sure about the 'good' part.” Then, “Jarvis, lights, twenty percent.” The room brightened to the requested level, shattering the darkness, bringing the space to a sort of pre-sunrise brightness. Tony looked down, then lifted...crap...his tail up out of the water. “No,” he said, “definitely no leg bones in there.”

Pepper giggled. “Now our vertebrae go _all_ the way down,” she said seductively.

Tony let his tail sink back into the water. “You're enjoying this _way_ too much.”

Pepper smiled. “You have no idea.”

Tony noticed that Pepper was completely naked and he smiled. “Well, at least I still have the best view.”

Pepper tipped backward and slapped her fin against the surface, sending a wave rolling over Tony's head. Tony retaliated.

“Now, children,” said Jarvis.

The two mer-people stopped what they were doing. “Right,” said Tony. “Jarvis, would you get Bruce down here? We...uh...have a problem to fix.”

“You think?” said Pepper.

“I thought you said you were getting used to it.”

“I did and I am, and watching you squirm is priceless, but that doesn't mean I want to _stay_ like this.”

“Even despite the...you know.”

Pepper smiled.

“I've summoned Doctor Banner, sir,” said Jarvis. “He should be here momentarily. In the meantime, might I say how handsome your tail is?”

“Har, har.”

“It suits you most swimmingly.”

“Remind me again why I programmed you with a sense of humor.”

“I don't know, sir. Perhaps you were bored?”

“Sure,” said Pepper, “because my Tony _never_ gets bored.”

Tony eyed his girlfriend.

“Now let's see that tail of yours,” she said.

Tony hesitated.

“Come on, now, don't be shy. You've seen mine, now I want to see yours.”

Tony rolled his eyes, but complied. He lifted his fin and the first couple of feet of peduncle out of the water. It was somewhat more substantial than Pepper's and a handsome bronze color with bold copper-patina spots with greenish halos and brick-red flecks. The fin was broad, strong, and slightly forked just like Pepper's. “There. Are you satisfied?”

Pepper smiled at him. “Yes, but just barely. I could go for a repeat of...”

Motion at the door interrupted her and the two of them swished up to the edge of the pool to prop themselves up on their arms just as Bruce walked in.

“Uh...hi,” said Bruce. “Am I...interrupting anything?”

“Yes,” said Tony.

“Then...uh...why am I here?”

“Tony has a tail, too,” said Pepper.

Bruce's eyebrows shot up. “Oh?”

“Go on,” said Pepper to Tony. “Show him.”

Tony half-glared at Pepper, but then heaved himself up out of the pool, settled himself on the edge, and curved his tail into the air. “There,” he said, “are you happy now?”

Bruce chuckled. “Oh, that's...that's funny. I think even the Other Guy would be amused.”

“Thanks,” said Tony dryly. “So have you been working on Pepper's...and now my, apparently...problem?”

“I'm still compiling data. I didn't know that wave hit you.”

“It didn't,” said Tony.

“Then how...?”

“Pepper and I...well...we...uh...you know.”

Bruce stared at Tony for a few moments. Then finally, “I see. Well that's...different.”

“You can say that again.”

“Look,” said Bruce, “I still haven't had breakfast yet and the Other Guy tends to want out when I don't get it and you still need answers, so maybe I'd better...”

“Yeah,” said Tony, making a dismissive gesture. “Got it.”

Bruce turned and left, chuckling and muttering.

“Well,” said Tony, looking around the room, “now I'm wishing I'd have installed a better entertainment system in here.” He glanced at Pepper, who was half-glaring up at him. “Not that _you're_ not entertaining...” He was interrupted again by more motion at the door.

Steve Rogers walked into the room, munching on a large granola bar. “Bruce said I should come in here and...” His voice trailed off as he noticed Tony's tail. “Damn.”

“You can say that again,” said Tony.

“Damn,” said Steve. “How did _that_ happen?”

Pepper and Tony looked knowingly at each other. “Never mind,” said Pepper.

“Oh.” Steve blushed slightly.

Steve turned around to see Thor walk into the room carrying an open box of PopTarts.

“Jarvis,” said Tony, “let's buy some Kellogg's stock, shall we? I think Thor here may be personally keeping them in business. Let's go two hundred shares for starters.”

“Yes, sir,” said Jarvis.

Thor stared at Tony.

“I see you got the memo, too,” said Tony.

Thor chuckled. The chuckle quickly escalated, turning into a laugh, which became a guffaw, which became a full-blown, roaring, belly-laugh that echoed in the sparsely-furnished room. The laugh brought a restrained chuckle from Steve.

“I'm glad _you're_ amused,” said Tony sarcastically.

Thor calmed himself somewhat. “Tony Stark,” he said, wiping a tear from his eye, “that is by far the most entertaining thing I have seen in a very long time.” He laughed again. “Tony Stark...mirth-giver! I salute you!” He paused for a moment. “Perhaps that shall be your new name...Tony Mirth-giver.”

“I kind of like it,” said Steve.

“Witness!” said Thor loudly.

Another motion at the door turned into Clint and Natasha.

“Bozhe moi!” said Natasha.

“Wow!” said Clint. “Is that real?”

“Yeah,” said Tony, “it's real.”

“Are we going to have to call you 'Captain Aquatica?'”

“Good grief,” muttered Tony. “Would one of you guys bring me a tablet? It would be nice to maybe get some work done while Bruce figures out how to reverse this.”

“And you think he needs your help?” said Natasha.

“Well...two heads are better than one. Besides, the whole experiment was my idea anyway.”

“At least we don't have to blame _this_ one on Loki,” said Clint.

“Do you think we could get him to fix it if we can't?” said Steve.

“I do not know,” said Thor pensively. “Loki is still imprisoned on Asgard. And convincing him to restore either of you to your human form would be like milking three bilgesnipe at once. That is assuming he can do it at all.”

“Didn't he change himself into a girl and give birth to an eight-legged horse?” said Clint.

“Yes,” said Thor, “but unless a particular transformation is magical in origin, a magical solution is highly unlikely.”

“I thought magic was just science in disguise,” said Tony.

“It is more complicated than that,” said Thor. “Besides, the methods of application must match. Whatever it is that turned you into mer-folk, that is what you must use to reverse it.”

“Supercritical heavy water,” said Tony.

Thor's eyebrows went up. “You cannot be serious.”

Tony nodded.

“Was there a quaternary omega signature?”

Tony nodded.

“And theta waves?”

“Among other things, yes. How'd you know?”

“I am Aesir. It is my business to know. Yet I do not hold an optimistic appraisal of your situation.”

“What about that healing room of yours?” said Steve.

Thor shook his head. “You are uninjured. Aside from being mer-folk, there is nothing inherently wrong with you. The healing room would have no effect.”

“Can we get a second opinion?” said Tony.

“From whom?” said Thor, crossing his arms, the box of PopTarts sticking up awkwardly between his bicep and forearm. “The Allfather would concur. Besides, I enjoy seeing you this way.”

Jarvis interrupted. “Sir, I am receiving a video call.”

“Put them on hold, Jarvis,” said Tony.

“I'm afraid my protocols are being overridden.”

“Again?”

“And I'm afraid the usual life-model-decoy excuse won't go over well with you in your...present condition.” Tony could almost hear Jarvis laughing at him. “I'm putting it on the screen here now, sir,” Jarvis continued.

“Thanks,” said Tony sarcastically.

“You're welcome, sir,”

Before Tony could roll back into the water, a large plasma screen mounted to the wall lit up with an S.H.I.E.L.D. emblem, which was quickly replaced with the image of Nick Fury.

“Good morning, Mister Stark,” said Fury. “I know it's early, so I'll get to the point. We have a situation.”

“Yeah,” said Tony, “I kind of noticed.”

Fury raised an eyebrow. “You know?”

“If it has anything to do with this...” He lifted his tail slightly off the floor, then set it back down.

“Late-night costume party?” said Fury, making little effort to hide his low opinion of what he perceived as the result of one of Stark's drunken escapades.

“Not exactly, no. Okay, not even remotely.”

“Then what's with the tail?”

“I'm not sure you really want to know.”

“Is it something that's going to be a problem?”

“You could say that,” said Tony, his voice strained. “Look, couldn't it have waited?”

“I'm afraid not. Your services are needed.”

“Yeah,” said Tony, “that's going to be a problem of its own.” He flexed his tail again, curling it up into a conspicuous C-shape.

“You're going to take that off, aren't you?”

“Uh...not exactly, no. And no, I don't know if it's permanent.”

Fury's mouth twitched again in a way that was even less subtle as Tony's situation dawned on him. “Would you excuse me?” Fury's tone was definitely _not_ his usual no-nonsense tone. He moved off-screen. The ensuing laughter was clearly audible through the Hi-Fi speakers Tony always insisted on having installed. To Tony's further embarrassment, the laughter wasn't just Fury's. Tony looked from the screen to his teammates and they all went from barely-concealed smiles to poorly-restrained snickers to peals of laughter. Even Pepper was tittering, which Tony supposed should be a good sign, given her otherwise predominating state of agitation over the whole thing. Still, he grumbled in displeasure.

After a couple of minutes, Fury reappeared, wiping a tear from his eye. “I'm sorry, Stark.”

“No, you're not. Can we get down to whatever it is? I have a mess to clean up.” Fury began to speak when Tony interrupted. “On second thought, no. It's not likely I'm going anywhere any time soon.” He looked at Steve. “Captain, you're up. Maybe you and the others should take Fury's call up in the situation room?”

“To give us something to do over breakfast other than laughing at you, you mean?” said Natasha.

“Har, har,” said Tony.

“He's right,” said Steve. “Besides, my stomach's growling.

“Your stomach's always growling,” said Tony.

The others just snickered a little and filed toward the door.

“If you need anything...” said Clint as he turned to follow.

“How about that pad?” said Tony.

“I'll be right back.”

“And a whole fish,” added Tony. “Dammit,” he muttered.

Clint raised an eyebrow.

“Don't...don't ask,” said Tony.

“They're delicious,” said Pepper.

“If you say so,” said Clint over his shoulder as he walked out the door.

Tony sighed. “Jarvis, transfer Director Fury's connection to the situation room, would you?” After Jarvis had complied, Tony continued. “It's already been a long day and it's barely started. It's going to be even longer and that's _without_ dealing with __him.”

A disturbance in the water behind him turned into some splashing and soon Pepper was maneuvering herself next to him. She laid her head on his shoulder and he instinctively put his arm around her and kissed her on the head.


	4. Chapter 4

Two days later, Bruce Banner walked into the pool room. The lights were dimmed. “Guys?” he called into the darkness. There was no response. “Uh...guys?” he repeated. Then he noticed a curious sloshing sound and he frowned. “Jarvis? Lights, twenty-five percent, please?”

The lights rose and Bruce could see Tony and Pepper swimming around underwater. They came to a stop and sat there for a couple of minutes. Bruce could tell their arms were wrapped around one another and he turned around. It was just as well he didn't look any longer than he already had. Before long, he heard a disturbance in the water behind him.

“Bruce, buddy,” said Tony. “Please tell you have some good news for us.”

Bruce turned around. Both Tony and Pepper were propped up on their arms at the edge of the pool. “Don't worry,” he said dismissively, “I really don't want to know.”

Tony hoisted himself up out of the water to perch on the pool's edge.

Bruce handed him one of the transparent tablets. “I have good news and bad news. The good news is that I know what happened. The bad news...” His voice trailed off as he watched Tony poke at the tablet, images of the sorts of things that went over Pepper's head zooming around it.

After a few minutes, Tony tossed the tablet onto the tile, then leaned back on his hands and craned his head back, eyes closed. He took a deep breath, held it, then slowly let it back out.

“What is it?” asked Pepper.

“It's permanent,” said Tony, eyes still closed, his voice strained.

“What?!”

Tony slowly straightened up and looked at Pepper. “It's...it's permanent.”

“Oh, my God,” said Pepper, her agitation from a couple of days before returning.

“Yeah,” said Tony. “Jarvis? It looks like I'm going to be making a few...unplanned modifications to the Mark-Nine.”

“Very good, sir,” said Jarvis. “Will you want torpedoes and a periscope with that?”

“Very funny, Jarvis.”

“Tony!” said Pepper. “Doctor Banner says it's permanent, and you take his word for it and _then_ think about the stupid suit?! What about _me_? What about _us_?”

“Well...I guess we're stuck here.”

“You think?” she said flatly.

Bruce bent down and picked up the tablet. “I'm...uh...sorry I don't have better news.”

“Make a note, Bruce,” said Tony, “no more experimenting on supercritical heavy water.”

“Yeah,” said Bruce, “got that.”

“So what the hell happened,” said Pepper, “and _why_ did it turn me into a mermaid?”

“I don't know,” said Bruce, “and the strange part is that Tony wasn't hit.”

“What?” said Pepper. “Then how did _he_ become a merman?”

“I don't know,” said Bruce again. “I went through the data and the video several times. Neither he nor I were within a meter of the outermost edge of the incident field. Neither of us should have been affected.”

“So...” Tony's voice trailed off. “Ah, crap.”

“What?” said Bruce.

“Pepper and I...you know...and I think...somehow that...” said Tony, fidgeting conspicuously as he talked.

Bruce cocked his head inquisitively. “She turned you into a merman by having sex with you? That's...different.”

“Tell me about it.”

“So if you had sex again, might that reverse the effect?”

“Um...no.”

Bruce raised his eyebrow, then shook his head sharply. “Never mind. Look, I really do wish I could be of more help on this. But I'm not Superman. You can't break the laws of physics.”

“But apparently we can bend them,” grumbled Pepper.

“I'll leave you two love...fish...to your...devices.” Bruce turned to leave.

Tony rolled his eyes. “Please don't call us fish. Oh, and Bruce? Hand me that tablet, would you?”

Bruce complied, then left the room. Tony started tapping on it.

“You're not still on about the suit, are you?” said Pepper.

“I'm getting to that,” said Tony without taking his eyes off the tablet. “But first, you and I have some more pressing matters.”

“Like what? I mean, besides that we both still have _tails_ and _gills_ and are _stuck_ with them?!”

“Things like the pool filters were never designed to handle...waste. And that this whole thing is not much of a living space,” he said, gesturing at the room around them. He looked at Pepper. “If you and I are going to live in here, we need to fix a few things, beginning with...all of that. And this room needs a new floor plan.” He tapped on the screen some more. “Closets close to the pool...”

“Closets? What, you think we're going out on the town like this?”

“Not in stilettos anyway. And while I love what they did to your calves...which I do miss, by the way...they're not all that practical.”

“You're impossible, Tony. And I happen to like my shoes...which I can't _wear_ anymore.”

“Look on the bright side,” said Tony, still tapping on the pad, “you won't have to worry about runs in your hose ever again.”

“Hrmph. How am I going to administrate from here? And how are you going to...do whatever it is that you do?”

“Bluetooth.”

“Naturally.”

“Come on. Everything's better with Bluetooth.”

“Tony, I can't do _everything_ by Bluetooth and neither can you.”

“True, but we can do enough of it to keep things going until I can work out the mobility issues.”

Pepper sighed.

“It'll be alright,” Tony assured her.

“It had better be,” she growled.

“Second,” said Tony, “since we have...um...new bodies, we want to know everything about them.”

“Speak for yourself,” grumbled Pepper.

Tony lowered the pad and looked his girlfriend in the eye. “This isn't something that's just going to go away if you ignore it long enough.”

“What if Bruce is wrong?”

“And what if he's not? I think we need to assume we're like this...” He gestured to their tails. “...forever. And if we're not, then at least we can learn something from ourselves and have an entertaining story to tell our children. Besides, I didn't see anything wrong with his math and...”

“Ch...children?” interrupted Pepper.

“Well...hypothetically-speaking.”

Pepper frowned.

“Jarvis? I'd like you to run full body scans on Pepper and myself. I want complete anatomical imaging, physiological readings, the works. I want to know everything there is to know about...mer-people.”

“I'm sorry, sir, but I'm afraid the necessary equipment is not installed in the pool room.”

Tony sighed. “Then I guess we'll have to go to the infirmary.”

“We're going to get there how?” said Pepper.

“Gurneys” said Tony.

“Great,” said Pepper sarcastically, “now I'm going to feel even _more_ like an experiment.”

“So will I. Don't worry, I'll be right beside you.” Tony reached over and squeezed Pepper's hand, then turned back to the tablet. “We're going to need a roll of trash bags....”

* * *

In the weeks that followed, Tony put everything else on hold while he worked on the problems raised by his and Pepper's new physiology. Despite the initial alarm over the whole thing, and the continued ribbing by the other Avengers, he'd found it all quite fascinating. At least, he did when he ignored the fact that the mer-people in the medical reports were Pepper and himself.

He was glad he'd made the two of them lay there all day while Jarvis and Bruce ran all those tests. Otherwise, there were things about them he never would have known. Some of those things were simply fascinating and others had life-and-death implications. Intolerances to things like glutein and alcohol were chief among them, both of which were going to require major and permanent diet changes. There would be reams of material if he were to have it printed. Even Pepper found it interesting and it did Tony's heart good to see it.

Tony and Pepper otherwise buried themselves in the work of making their new home more habitable. He had a new filter system installed in the pool. An enclosure now occupied one corner of it. It had two small rooms, each with an opening into the pool and each with a small hole in the lower wall through which waste was to be expelled...essentially his-and-hers water closets.

Most of the pool's internal surface had been re-done in tile of a pleasing green color. Slip-resistant surfaces were no longer necessary, save around the perimeter of the shallow end where Tony and Pepper would be “kneeling” and would need to avoid having their slippery tails constantly sliding out from under them while trying to conduct business.

Along one side of the shallow end, a pair of modified vanities had been set up, complete with mirrors and drawers above water and a couple of stools mounted to the pool wall so that each of them could sit and do the usual grooming-related things...brushing teeth and hair, applying make-up, etc.

Large screens and mid-space projectors adorned the other side of the shallow end so that both of them could work from what Tony had essentially converted into a home-office. A curtain of sorts now also stretched across the room to separate their living area from the office space.

While all that was being done, Tony designed and had built a pair of mobility units. He scoffed at the idea of wheel-chairs, and so the new ones had been based on Segways. The usual upright form was not terribly conducive to mer-physiology, so Tony had essentially re-designed them. Each was designed with a kneeling platform of sorts upon which he and Pepper would “kneel” on a bend in their tails. The unit's control riser—which could collapse downward out of the way and then telescope back upward when needed--was mounted considerably forward. Normally, that would have left the whole thing out of balance, except that their tails would provide counter-balance. They usually left their units propped against a wall near a set of dedicated electrical outlets.

Pepper came up with lower-body clothing for both of them. Each garment consisted of a thin rubbery sheath sown into a cloth outer layer that sealed around the trunk just above the point where the scales terminated at the waist. The rubbery layer retained moisture and prevented the tail from drying out. The cloth layer protected against external wear and abrasion. Fabrics included cotton, linen, and canvas for daily activity and silks for formal wear.

Pepper also took care of the decorating. The bare walls had given the room an annoying amount of echo. Medieval tapestries, Persian rugs, and hanging quilts adorned the walls. Indoor-outdoor carpeting had been lain on most of what had been bare concrete-and-tile floor. She'd insisted that nearly all of it be sound-absorbing, which excluded most of what she considered to be Tony's tacky and ridiculously overpriced art collection.

After that, Tony went to work modifying the design of the Mark-9 Iron Man suit. He'd had to completely eliminate the legs, of course. The repulsors were mounted on both dorsal and ventral sides of the fin casing. Preliminary computer modeling indicated that steering would be much tighter and more precise thanks to the way his tail moved compared to his erstwhile legs, though he anticipated a bit of a learning/un-learning curve. Flying would not be much of a problem. Take-off and landing, on the other hand, was proving to be more of an issue. He finally settled on a system of hydraulic struts that extended from each side of the caudal peduncle. The struts would support him while on the ground, much like the four legs of a table.

Entering and exiting the suit also required reworking the procedure. First, he'd hoist himself off of the mobility unit and grab a pull-up bar, which would then automatically raise him off the ground. Then Jarvis would emplace the lower-body components of the suit. Once those were in place, Tony would release the bar and then the upper-body part of the suit would be fitted around him. Getting out of the suit would be done in reverse. While Tony personally preferred the ambulatory removal system he'd had with the Mark-6, he was overall satisfied with the result.


	5. Chapter 5

Tony launched himself out of the water. He reached zenith, then completely lost it, and fell flailing back into the pool with an undignified splash.

“No, no, no,” said Pepper when Tony had resurfaced. “Like this.” She ducked under the water. A few moments later, she erupted from it, droplets flying from her body and light glinting distractingly off her scales. She held her arms out to her sides. She reached zenith, hung there for a moment, then semi-folded into a neat, nearly splash-less dive. Another moment later, she popped up in front of Tony.

“You've been paying _far_ too much attention to the Olympics,” said Tony.

“And Animal Planet,” said Pepper. “It's a good thing you have the Discovery Channel.”

Tony rolled his eyes, then bobbed closer to Pepper. He took her by the hands. “I say we give these gills of ours a work-out.” He smirked.

She smiled back and closed the distance, wrapping her arms around him in an embrace. They sank beneath the surface without breaking their kiss.

Once underwater, they let their lips separate to allow water to pass through their mouths and over their gills before resuming the kiss, a procedure to which they'd grown accustomed. They aligned their bodies as their hands roamed down toward each others' gluteal regions.

Tony could already feel himself starting to expand. It was still strange not to have it all hanging out, as it were. That thought was derailed as Pepper's ventral side bumped up against his. He gently grabbed her and held her in place as he finished unfolding, savoring the sweet feeling that accompanied his moving into her. She tightened her own grip on his gluteals and arched her back a little in her own pleasured response.

Then they began to move, slowly at first. Their tails moved up and down as their bodies undulated, both Tony and Pepper enjoying the pleasant bumps and brushes of tails and fins against one another. Around and around they swam, their pace quickening as the sensations of him inside her built in concert with their motions. They swam and twirled, unconsciously adjusting course to miss the walls of the pool, each undulation of their bodies generating an in-and-out motion that sent fresh waves of pleasure through them both.

At last, when Tony wasn't sure how much longer he could hold it, he felt her grip on him tighten and her body stiffened. He released himself, tightening his own grip on her for one final thrust as he came. They floated there in the water for a few moments before drifting apart and surfacing.

“I think we're improving,” said Tony.

“It's still weird,” said Pepper.

“I'll give you that, hands-down. Still, I think I prefer it to the terrestrial way.”

Pepper rolled her eyes as the two of them moved slowly over to a wide shelf at one side of the shallow end. “Actually...so do I,” she said as she laid her head against his chest. “It's a good thing we actually like each other.”

“Well...there's always hate sex.”

Pepper swooshed her hand through the water, splashing a small wall of it into his face. “You're impossible!”

Tony just laughed. “Now, if I can figure out a better way to get the water out of our ears...”

“Just go to sleep, Tony,” sighed Pepper. “Jarvis, lights.” The room immediately went dark.

* * *

One morning, Tony wheeled into the dining room, Pepper behind him, both in a very good mood. The other Avengers were already assembling breakfast. Steve and Natasha were butting heads over the omelets. Each seemed to have their own idea of not only how they should be cooked, but just what should go into them. Thor was impatiently chomping on a few PopTarts.

“Good morning,” said Clint.

Tony grunted. “It's too early.”

“You weren't up too late...um...scaling each other, were you?” said Steve. That brought a glare from Tony and snickers from the others. “So why are you all dressed up?”

“Dressed up?” said Pepper. She looked down at that casual clothing she and Tony wore: T-shirts—Pepper's a feminine-cut designer tee and Tony's proudly displaying a design from someone called “Blackmore's Night”--and lightweight cotton tail-covers. She looked back and Steve and shrugged.

“Well...you're in...tails,” said Steve, a mischievous grin on his face. That brought another glare from Tony and some barely-restrained laughter from the others, including Pepper.

“If you weren't cooking,” said Tony, “I'd throw something at you.”

“You know I'd just dodge.”

“Hrmph.”

“Unless he Forded instead,” said Clint. Everyone but Thor and Steve groaned.

“I do not understand the reference,” said Thor.

“Welcome to the club,” said Steve.

“So,” said Natasha, “Blackmore's Night?”

“Oh,” said Tony, looking down at his shirt, “Pepper's idea.”

“You like it,” said Pepper, “admit it.”

“You're just bent on getting me into more trouble, aren't you...and hellishly so.”

“You have no idea.” Pepper turned back to the others as she and Tony settled at the table.

Tony looked across the room at something on the other side of the common area just off the open dining room. “What's that?” He pointed at it.

“Um,” said Clint, “it's an aquarium.”

Tony cocked his head in a way that said, 'Seriously?' “I can see that, Barton. I meant, _why_ do we have an aquarium?” At first, no one answered. The moments crawled by. “Well?” said Tony.

Finally, Thor spoke. “I believe it was Captain Rogers' idea.”

Tony regarded Steve suspiciously. “Care to explain?”

“I...thought you might like some company.”

“Company? What did you put in there anyway?”

“You could just go look.”

“Or you could just tell me.”

“I think it would be more amusing for the Mirth-giver to look at them,” said Thor.

Tony thought for a moment, then rolled his eyes. “Fine,” he said, making no effort to hide his exasperation.

He swiveled about and rolled across the room, the others in tow, to settle in front of a fifty-gallon aquarium. It was equipped with both under-gravel and surface filter-aerators and the substrate was rounded gravel mostly in red and yellow. A quick glance at the small thermometer mounted on the glass read seventy-five degrees. The tank was full of fish. Most of them were some sort of catfish, ranging in size from about an inch up to four inches in length and in colors from white to bronze to green. But instead of typical scales, they had overlapping plates.

Tony turned to Steve. “Company?”

“Well...you know,” said Steve.

“No, Steve,” said Tony impatiently, “I don't know. Personal appearances to the contrary, I am _not_ an ichthyologist.” That brought a snicker from Natasha.

Tony continued to regard Steve, waiting for an answer. “They're Corydoras,” said Steve finally.

“Which are...?” said Tony.

“Armored catfishes,” said Steve. Natasha and Clint started giggling. Thor was also making a visible effort to avoid laughing. “The way we...I...figured, these guys...” He motioned to the little fish in the tank. “...have armor on their tails. And you...” He let the statement float in the air, waiting for Tony to pick it up. He didn't have to wait long.

“Oh, God...” said Tony, pressing his fingers against his forehead. The others, even Pepper, lost it, disintegrating into laughter.

“Oh, come on, Tony,” said Pepper between laughs, “they're adorable.” She indicated the fish. “Admit it.”

After a minute, Tony started to chuckle, too. “You know,” he said through all the laughter, “I'm going to hurt every one of you.”

“Of course you are,” said Thor, clearly not taking Tony seriously.

“Are you all going to mock me all day,” said Tony, “or are we actually going to eat breakfast...sometime this morning?” The Avengers one by one made their way back to the dining area amid scattered snorts of lingering laughter.

Breakfast resumed without much further ado. Steve and Natasha had reached a state of detente over the omelets. Everyone's had some kind of sausage, onions and peppers. Tony and Pepper's had shrimp and barely-cooked Atlantic salmon. They all shared a loaf of whole-wheat toast, except for Tony and Pepper, both of whom had developed an annoying glutein intolerance which had to do with their physiology.

Conversation ranged from lingering fallout related to the Battle of Manhattan, technological implications gleaned from studying the Chitauri, further modifications to the building to make Tony and Pepper's lives a bit easier, the still-unresolved public-relations issues surrounding Tony and Pepper being mer-people, freshwater tropical fish, and Asgardian fauna.

When the meal appeared to be winding down, Pepper spoke up. “I have an announcement to make.” All eyes turned toward her. “Now, I thought of all sorts of ways to say this, but this seemed the most...appropriate...and amusing.” She took a deep breath and let out. “I'm pregnant.”

That brought a variety of responses. Tony stared at Pepper in stunned silence. Thor let out a great belly-laugh. Bruce grinned. Natasha, Steve and Clint all let loose with some whistling and such.

“Are you sure?” said Tony.

“At first I wasn't. I mean, for all I know, mermaids don't _have_ menstruation or if they...we...do, then it's off from the human pattern. But after a couple of months, I asked Jarvis to scan me. So...yes, I'm sure.” Tony started to open his mouth again when Pepper interrupted. “And yes, of course it's yours.”

“Will he...she...still have legs?”

Pepper frowned. “I don't know! I don't even know when it happened.” Tony started to talk, but Pepper interrupted. “Yes, yes, it was while we were having sex,” she said impatiently, “I mean I don't know if it was when _you_ were still human, or even I was still human.” She paused, her expression changing. “And I just realized how weird that sounds.”

Tony exhaled heavily. He sat there for a few moments, staring at Pepper and blinking.

“Well?” said Pepper. “Aren't you going to say anything else?”

Tony backed his wheels away from the table and turned it as if to go. Pepper's face fell and she looked like she might be a minute away from tears. But Tony didn't leave. Instead, he twisted off the unit, coming to rest on the floor, supported by the bend in his tail. The motion put him in a more-or-less kneeling position in front of Pepper. He reached up and took her by the hand.

“Virginia Potts,” he said, using her real name, “I'd like to say I've given this a great deal of thought, but the truth is, I really haven't...not consciously anyway. You've seen me at my best and my worst. You know all my faults, including the ones I don't know and especially the ones I deny and you've _still_ stayed with me. That was even before the...uh...mer-thing. That put as big a strain on our relationship as anything I can imagine and you're _still_ here. Damned if I know why. Over the last few months, I've come to realize that I really do love you. And now that...now that we're apparently...um...parents...that sort of clinches things for me. Will you marry me?”

Pepper had begun to tear up almost as soon as Tony had started talking. By the time he'd asked the question, those tears were flowing freely and her smile threatened to split her face in two. She nodded vigorously. “Yes!” She leaned forward and the two of them kissed amid cheers and claps from everyone else.

“ _WITNESS!_ ” bellowed Thor.


	6. Chapter 6

Pepper reclined on a sofa in the common room. Her anatomy no longer allowed her to sit, per se, as sitting involved hinging at the waist that was only possible with the ball-and-socket joints she no longer possessed. Sometimes she could do something approximating sitting with her tail out to the side, but it wasn't a particularly ergonomic position and she wasn't able to maintain it for any length of time without propping herself up with an arm.  
She leaned against the sofa's arm with her tail draped elegantly over the cushions, her fin resting on the floor. She wore a linen charcoal tail-cover and a light cotton jumper of the type usually called knee-length in an apricot color that matched her hidden scales. A casual observer might not initially notice her tail.

“No, no, no,” said Pepper through her Bluetooth, “it has to be gluten-free. Yes, all of it.” She tapped on a pad. “And yes, the top layer has to be salmon-loaf. Fine, I'll have someone else do that. Yes, I realize it's strange, but I have my reasons. Are you seriously going to argue with Tony Stark's fiancee... _and_ CEO of Stark Industries...or am I going to go hire someone else? I thought so. Now, repeat all that back to me. Uh-huh. Right. Good. I think we have an understanding. Sure. E-mail me an invoice, I'll review it, and then I'll wire the funds. No problem. Thank-you.” She hung up and exhaled as Tony wheeled into the room.

“How's it going?” he asked.

“Strangely,” she said. “This would be _so_ much easier if we were human. I'm just glad no one _else_ has any odd dietary requirements. And you'd think that a high-end bakery wouldn't have such a problem with gluten-free. They'd never bat an eye over it if we were doing this on the _other_ coast.”

“Did they have trouble with the salmon-loaf?”

“You have no idea. I think the guy just about had a coronary over the goat-milk cream-cheese frosting.”

“Honey, I just about had a coronary over that.”

“Well, it _has_ to be frosted, it's a _cake_! Well, sort of. It would taste really weird with a sugar frosting. And we're lactose-intolerant, so it couldn't be normal cream-cheese. That leaves us with goat cheese.”

“Well, yes, I understand all that. And it sounds pretty tasty to me. You know, I don't think I'd have even touched that before becoming a merman.”

“I'm glad you can finally say that without twitching.”

“Me, too.” He leaned over and kissed her tenderly. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down, deepening it. “What about the guest list?” he asked after a couple of minutes.

“It's short. Neither of us really has family. Well...we do, but not close enough to matter. Second-cousins, that sort of thing. I'm sending invitations to them anyway, but it's more of a formality as I don't really expect them to come. So it looks like it'll be...well, pretty much just us.”

“The usual suspects, you mean?”

“Exactly.”

“Fair enough. Means I can spring for the good stuff without breaking the bank.”

Pepper rolled her eyes. “You're Tony Stark. We could invite a small town and and it still wouldn't break the bank.”

“So have you thought about names? For the baby, I mean.”

Pepper sighed. “I've been busy with the wedding _and_ running the company. What do you think?”

Tony decided that didn't need a response, so he simply kissed his fiancee. “I love you,” he said.

Pepper blinked. It was the first time he'd ever actually said it. “You do?”

“Of course I do. I'm marrying you, aren't I?”

“Oh, come on, Tony,” she said, her voice carrying a mix of teasing and indignation. “People get married for more reasons than love. This, for example.” She pointed at her abdomen.

“That was...a... _the_...deciding factor. I just...uh...wouldn't admit it.”

“You don't say,” she said sarcastically, her voice still light with amusement. She pulled him down and kissed him again. “But you have no idea how long and how much I've been waiting for you to say that.”

“I love you,” he said again. The couple lost themselves in more kissing and nuzzling before finally deciding to retire to the pool.

* * *

It was a bright, sunny day in upstate New York. The Stark-Potts wedding party was assembled—and the irony of the term was lost on few of attendees—at the northernmost of the Binnewater Lakes. The east shore was occupied by an upscale summer campground and Pepper had rented out the whole place for three days in the middle of the week.

She and Tony still hadn't decided how to handle telling the world about their having become mer-people. They didn't want to have to deal with what would surely become a media circus just yet. Besides, it would have conflicted horribly with their nuptials. For that reason, and because they had so few actual friends, they'd decided to make their wedding a small, family affair.

A couple of small docks had been arranged jutting out a short distance from the shore. Most of the guests—of whom there were very few--sat in chairs on their planks, except for Director Fury, who stood on shore in his usual leather duster. A small floating platform holding a silk screen floated a bit further out and the rest of the wedding party waited in three-foot-deep water closer to shore.

When all was ready, Clint Barton began to play the traditional wedding march on bagpipes, accompanied by Thor—looking oddly uncomfortable in a tux--on some Asgardian version of a digeridoo. The small platform rocked a little, accompanied by a small splash. Soon, Pepper rounded it and bobbed forward, making a considerable effort to keep as much of her torso as possible above water. She wore the upper part of a gown—the remainder having been removed so that it wouldn't become entangled in her tail—of a tasteful light apricot-beige that matched her scales. She'd decided against white for reasons she considered to be obvious. She carried a bundle of stout-stemmed irises and water lilies. Her hair was done up in an intricate and elegant arrangement of braids and coils that held it out of the water.

As she neared shore, her bridal attendants—Natasha as maid of honor and Sharon Carter--joined her. Together, they made their way the final meters to where Tony, in the upper part of a tux, kneeling on the substrate next to Steve and Bruce—both dressed in tux jackets and UnderArmor dry-suit bottoms--waited. At first, Tony stared at her, his jaw hanging open. Pepper just beamed at him until he regained his composure and smiled back at her. The bride and groom joined hands before turning to Agent Maria Hill.

“Dearly beloved,” began Hill, “we are gathered here today to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony. These two are as well-matched as any I've had the privilege to wed. If any present know of any reason why these two should not be married, speak now, or forever hold your peace.” There was a little shifting on the dock, but silence otherwise. Maria smiled.

“Anthony Stark, do you take this woman to be your lawfully-wedded wife, to have and to hold, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, for long as you both shall live?”

“I do,” said Tony.

“And do you, Virginia Potts, take this man to be your lawfully-wedded husband, to have and to hold, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, for long as you both shall live?”

“I do,” said Pepper.

“Do you have the rings?”

Natasha and Bruce produced them and handed them to the bride and groom.

“With this ring, I thee wed,” said Tony as he slipped a ring onto Pepper's hand.

“With this ring, I thee wed,” said Pepper, doing the same for Tony.

“Then by the power invested in me by the State of New York,” said Maria, “I am authorized to pronounce you man and wife and to declare you to be Mister and Missus Tony Stark. You may kiss the bride.”

The couple did so amid what would have been thunderous applause had there been enough people.

“ _WITNESS!_ ” thundered Thor.

The couple recessed over to another dock on which sat refreshments, mostly on low, Japanese-style folding tables. Tony grabbed Pepper by the waist and helped her out of the water and onto the dock. Water cascaded off of her tail and her scales glittered in the sunlight. When she was settled, Tony heaved himself out of the water and sat on the dock next to his wife. Everyone else made their way over to the happy couple.

A few people that neither Tony nor Pepper recognized walked over to them. “Um...mister and...missus...Stark?”

“Yes?” said Tony and Pepper in unison.

“Um...hi. I don't believe we've ever formally met,” said one as they all settled onto short three-legged stools set up to facilitate discussions with the newlyweds. They introduced themselves as the second-cousins Pepper had insisted on inviting—a twenty-something man and woman from Tony's side and a family of four from Pepper's.

“You...you came!” said Pepper.

“Well...yes,” said Pepper's cousin Joe uncertainly.

“I'm sorry,” said Pepper, “I...we...well, we don't really know each other, so...”

“We weren't sure you'd show,” finished Tony.

“Why are you mermaids?” blurted Joe's young daughter.

“Holly!” said her mother Megan. “That's rude!”

Pepper giggled. “Oh, that's alright. We're used to it.” She was glad she only had to answer potential questions about being a mermaid. She wasn't showing a baby bulge yet, for which she was thankful. “In answer to your question, Holly dear...we have absolutely no idea.”

“That's not entirely...” Tony began, but quickly stopped talking as Pepper shot him a look.

“We don't really know,” Pepper said again. “It's kind of fun, though.”

Holly giggled. “Really?”

Pepper nodded.

“Can I be a mermaid, too?”

“No, honey,” said Pepper shaking her head, “I'm afraid not. I'm sorry. Believe me when I say that as much fun as it is, it can also be a first-rate pain in the tail.”

Holly giggled again. “You're funny.”

“Thank-you.”

“Thank-you all for coming,” said Tony.

“Really,” added Pepper. “We mean it.”

“Well,” said Tony's cousin Ruth, “we knew we were related, but...well, it's like being related to the President. Trying to horn it would be...well, it just wouldn't go well. There's a saying...'don't try to be a great man, just be a man and let history make its own judgments.'”

“Who said that?”

“Zephram Cochrane.”

Tony chuckled. “I see.”

“I want some cake,” said Joe's son Matthew.

“So do I,” said Tony. He turned to his wife. “Shall we?”

They maneuvered over to the table—thankful that a heavy dew had left the dock boards damp--turned and got everyone's attention. As per traditions everywhere, the two of them held a cake knife together and together cut two slices off the topmost layer—a salmon-loaf with goat-milk cream-cheese frosting. They fed it to each other, Tony being ornery enough to try smearing it on Pepper's face. She was expecting it, however, and playfully thwarted his fishy advances.

It was time for toasts. Much to Tony's disappointment, they'd settled on a non-alcoholic champagne. Giving up booze had been Tony's single greatest challenge about becoming a merman. It was just as well, as they didn't have to worry about separate drinks for the few minors present, nor did they have to worry about anyone trying to drink and drive, or worse, getting drunk and making an ass out of themselves or anyone else. Both Tony and Pepper were greatly relieved not to have to worry about that last bit.

Bruce stepped up, took a pair of filled flutes and passed one to the bride and groom before taking one for himself. “Ladies and gentlemen,” he said, “normally, this sort of speech involves someone who's known one or both of the couple for years. There should be some reference to something embarrassing, sentimental, fraternal, or the like. I don't have any of those things. But some would say I have something better, something brothers-in-arms know.

“Tony and I haven't known each other that long. In fact, we were brought together very much against our will. We were both content...well, _he_ was content...to be doing our own things. We then proceeded to save the word together. The thing about Tony is that once you get past his public self, you can always count on him to do the right thing. He lay down on the wire to save Earth and there's no doubt in my mind that he'll do the same for Pepper. To Tony and Pepper!”

The others echoed the toast before Natasha took Bruce's place.

“I've long said love is for children. At least, that's what I've told myself. Clearly I'm wrong. Now, I haven't known Pepper long either. But in that time, I have come to realize that she's the strongest woman I've ever met. And as a Russian, that's saying something. I really can't think of anyone else who's woman enough to be married to Tony Stark, nor another couple who's a better match for each other.” There were chuckles. “To Pepper and Tony!” That toast was also echoed.

Steve cut the rest of the cake, the bottom two layers being gluten-free, one layer chocolate with organic raspberry filling and the other vanilla with goat-milk custard filling. Also laid out on the table were caviar, fresh raw trout sliced into bite-sized strips, gluten-free crackers, oat cakes, candied mint leaves, cashews, Brazil nuts, pine nuts, and macadamia nuts.

Everyone mingled with everyone else, telling stories and generally having a good time. Tony and Pepper enjoyed getting to know their estranged relatives and invited them to Avengers Tower, an offer that was enthusiastically accepted. Pepper even let Holly gently poke at her gill slits. After a while, Tony and Pepper made their way to the end of the dock. They surreptitiously shed their upper-body clothing—they were still naked from the waist down, their scales glittering in the sun—and plunged into the lake for a little marital conjugation.

The party broke up and most everyone made their way back to whence they'd come. Only Natasha and Thor remained to supervise cleanup and to render any assistance the Starks might have once emerging from the lake.


	7. Chapter 7

Pepper lay on the tile by the pool, a wet towel draped over her salient bits. Tony sat next to her, holding one of her hands in his own and fiddling with his wedding band with the other. Bruce knelt beside her, holding a device Clint insisted on calling a “tricorder.” It was actually a portable MRI scanner with a few Stark upgrades. None of the Avengers knew how to read ultrasounds. Even if they had, both Tony and Pepper had grown hyper-sensitive to sound since becoming mer-people and they were both quite sure the baby wouldn't like it either.

“I don't think I can do it,” said Pepper. “I don't care what we see, I still don't think I can.”

Tony squeezed Pepper's hand in a way he hoped would be reassuring.

Minutes crawled by. Finally, Bruce announced he was done.

“Jarvis?” said Tony.

Without further command, the lights dimmed to ten percent and a mid-space projection of Tony and Pepper's baby appeared above her. It was curled in the usual fetal position. As expected, instead of legs, it had a distinct tail. The fin was barely developed, but was obviously there. Gills were also clearly visible along the baby's jawline, protruding conspicuously from their slits. Otherwise, it was a normal, healthy fetus, complete with nose, ears, closed eyes, and little clenched fingers. It was even sucking its thumb. Tony and Pepper were both mesmerized.

“Oh!” said Pepper in delight. “Wow! Look at its little fingers...and little fin...and gills...and precious little face.” She gazed at the image a little longer. “We're keeping it, Tony.” She glanced at her husband, who was still staring at the image. “Tony? Tony!”

“Huh?” said Tony, tearing his gaze away and looking at Pepper. “I...uh...think we should keep it.”

“That's what I just said.”

“You did?”

Pepper nodded. “Actually, I think I'd already decided even before I knew. But now that I've seen it...”

“So you're not, you know...?”

“Scared? Oh, I'm still scared, don't get me wrong. But just look!” She motioned at the image of her baby. “It's adorable...and perfect...and still not even ready to be born yet. Am I supposed to be this in-love with my baby?” She rested a hand on her swollen belly.

Tony smiled, then looked back at the image. “Well,” he said, “it's a mer-baby, alright.”

“It's a girl!” said Bruce.

“Are you sure?” said Tony.

Bruce pointed at the baby's ventral side, indicating the diagnostic area in question.

“Um,” said Tony, “if you haven't noticed, mine doesn't...um...stick out, either.”

“Right,” said Bruce tentatively. “So how do we know...I mean, aside from a DNA test?”

Pepper sat up and peered closer at the image above her. “It's too small,” she said, pointing to the area in question.

“What's too small?” said Bruce.

“The...genital opening. It's too small.” She turned to Tony. “I think we're having a boy.”

Tony's fidgeting, which had stalled with the virtual presentation of their baby, escalated.

“Is something wrong, honey?” said Pepper.

“No...nothing...nothing at all.”

“Are you sure?”

Tony sighed, then glanced at Bruce. “Uh...thanks, Bruce. Can we count on your services in a few months?”

“Really...you want me in a pool next to a woman in labor, handling a newborn?”

“Just think about it.”

“Sure.” Bruce left, taking the device with him, the image of the baby still hanging in mid-air.

Tony turned back to Pepper. “I'm happy...really I am. It's just...I'm worried it'll be just like me and Dad all over again. I don't want that for our child.”

“Then don't let it.”

“I don't know how.”

“You're smart, Tony. You'll figure it out. More to the point, I won't let you get in your own way.”

“Now, _that_ I believe.”

Pepper reached up, wrapped her hands around Tony's neck and pulled him down for a kiss. They stayed that way for some time, laying next to each other and kissing.

* * *

Pepper lay on the shallow shelf that Tony had had installed during the refurbishing. It had been intended to serve as a seating platform that would leave their tails submerged while they worked on the business of running Stark Industries and its associated endeavors, not the least of which included activities with the Avengers. Tony semi-knelt next to her, holding her hand. Bruce had bowed out and Steve had taken a crash-course on midwifery. Pepper hadn't been sure that had been such a good idea, but Tony had insisted. Both were completely naked, having grown more comfortable in nothing at all while in the water. Steve and Natasha stood by in swimsuits, ready to assist.

“Are you sure we shouldn't be completely submerged?” he Tony.

“I'll let you know,” Pepper grunted as contraction flowed through her body. She stiffened, then relaxed as it passed, gasping for breath. “But air holds more oxygen than water and God knows I need it right now.”

“Well, when you're ready to slip into something deeper...”

“Yeah, I'll let you... _know_!” she wailed as another contraction hit.

Tony cringed. He wished there was something he could do. They'd discussed drugs, but neither of them had been sure how that would affect her mermaid physiology. Naturally, Tony had asked Jarvis to run a series of computer simulations. Each one had yielded horrifying results and the subject had been summarily dropped.

“I see a head!” said Tony after another ten minutes. Pepper seemed relieved. “We should get you down another step.” Pepper nodded and Tony waited for the next contraction to pass before helping her slide down to slightly deeper water. That way, the baby would be expelled completely submerged and they wouldn't be fighting gravity nearly as much.

“Here he comes!” said Tony. Natasha stepped over and helped Pepper roll onto her side. Steve stepped over behind Tony, knife in hand, and prepared to handle the umbilical and afterbirth. The baby slipped out of Pepper's birth canal, fluids lightly clouding the water in tendrils of yellow, red, and orange.

Steve leapt into action. Reaching over Pepper, he grasped the cord, sliced it, then deftly tied it off one-handed. The knife all but self-cleaned in the water, but he still wiped the blade before re-sheathing it.

“Impressive, Steve,” said Natasha. Steve nodded.

“Isn't he supposed to...um...barf up the fluid?” said Steve.

Tony took the child and turned him upside down. The fluid drained out, the child took a breath, and began to scream. Tony took care of the remaining mucus plugs before handing the baby to his mother.

“He has a big mouth like his dad,” said Tony.

“At least he's pre-cleaned,” said Steve with a shrug.

“Bozhe moi,” said Natasha, “he _does_ have a tail!”

“And gills,” said Tony.

They all looked at the newborn baby Pepper held in her arms. Like his parents, he had a tail, covered with scales. His fin, bare of scales like those of his parents, was small in proportion to the rest of him, as was his tail. Human newborns were like that with respect to their legs, though, which gave everyone some manner of reassurance that he'd grow up to develop a normal tail. His little gills protruded from the slits in his neck. No one seemed to have any idea how a mer-baby would develop. Tony and Pepper were looking forward, though with great trepidation, to learning all about it.

“Wow,” said Steve. “Uh...congratulations, you two. It's a...fish.”

Pepper looked abruptly at Steve. “Don't call my son a fish!”

“Sorry,” said Steve sheepishly.

The baby groped at Pepper's naked chest, found a nipple, and began to suckle. Pepper grunted. “You say this is supposed to hurt a little, right, dear?” she asked Tony.

“That's what they say,” said Tony.

“So have you decided what you're going to name him?” said Steve.

“Alexander Neptune,” said Tony.

“That's a good name,” said Steve. “Odd, but good.”

Tony and Pepper both shrugged as Steve turned his attention to the afterbirth that suddenly squirted out of Pepper. She looked down. “Euw!”

“Uh...yeah,” said Steve as he collected all the effluent into a biohazard container generally required for such things. “Tony? You want us to save this? You know, cord-blood and what not?”

“Yeah. There's a fridge in the lab. On second thought, give it to Bruce. He'll handle it.”

“You still think there's a chance he's wrong about your condition being irreversible and the answer might be found in this?” said Steve, indicating the contents of the container.

Tony looked at the Captain like he was nuts.

“Yeah,” said Steve, “never mind.” He turned and left the room.

“If you don't need anything more...” said Natasha.

“Sure,” said Pepper.

“We'll do the blood sample and fingerprinting thing later,” said Tony.

“He's cute,” said Natasha over her shoulder as she exited the pool to leave the new parents to fawn over their brand new son.

“I'm glad we decided to keep him,” said Pepper after Natasha had gone.

“So am I,” said Tony.

“He's beautiful,” said Pepper.

“Yeah, he is, isn't he?” said Tony as he shifted position to sit on the ledge next to his wife. “I mean...for all that he has a tail and all.”

Pepper cocked her head. “Tony... _we_ have tails.”

“I know. It's just that...well, I never expected any children of mine...which, until now, have always been entirely theoretical...to be...well...like him.”

Pepper considered that for a moment, and then smiled. “He's our baby.”

“So you're saying I should give you, what, fifty percent of the credit?”

“Fifty? In your dreams. I was prepared to let you have twelve.”

“Twelve percent?”

“I suppose an argument could be made for fifteen.”

“You're going to make me pay for all that in some subtle way, aren't you?”

“Oh, I'm just getting started. And I'm not going to be that subtle.”

“Can we just enjoy our moment? Regardless of who has what percent of it?”

Pepper giggled, the grin never leaving her face.


End file.
